Thursday, 10 April 2014

What NOT to do at the cinema

So I've just been to see Noah, which I did not enjoy for two main reasons:

One, the film itself gave me a bad feeling. You know as soon as you've left the cinema whether you liked the film or not, and this one just made me feel depressed and different and like something was completely wrong. I'm not saying the effects or the acting weren't good, because they were, just that if I had to describe the film I'd say it was like Supernatural's version of the story of Noah, but gone horrendously wrong.

The film aside - which I can do nothing to change - the other reason I did not enjoy my experience was because of the cinema-goers who ruined it for me. Two women who sat behind me yapped ALL THE WAY THROUGH. You think I'm joking but I literally heard them talking about their plans for next week with a running commentary of the current on-scene action in between. 

Whispering now and again if you notice an obvious bit of foreshadowing or spot a famous actor - that's fine. But literally talking throughout the film right by my ear is just something I cannot accept. I shushed them and shook my head a few times but they didn't notice because they were too busy yapping!

Their particular strategy involved only talking when the movie got particularly loud, so as the whole cinema wouldn't notice. They were good, but I noticed. As I sat there, wishing I hadn't noticed them and trying not to think of ways I could hit them, I thought: These must be regular movie yappers. After all, they quit during the quiet parts and once the movie ended they practically bolted out the exit. Strategic moves if I ever saw any.

I swear, when I watch a movie, I sink into it. I live it with the actors. I would like to ask these people, these yapping movie goers who have no consideration for anyone else, what exactly they are paying £7 for when they don't even watch the movie??


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